I might delete this later but I feel like shit. ADHD / my inability to get it under control to a level that works for my partner is destroying my relationship and I'm trying to work on my issues and find strategies and some things are getting better but it's like our relationship has already been damaged beyond repair.

One HUGE issue for us is me again and again forgetting something that's important for my partner and them feeling deeply hurt as a result because they feel their needs don't matter. But they do matter and I try to care for them as best as I can but I also keep forgetting things. And I also understand that this is extremely hurtful regardless of whether or not I'm doing it on purpose (which I'm not).

My partner also suffers from strong migraines, so sleep is important to them. I know this. Bedtime is 10pm and when I'm out and have to be home by a certain time I will be (unless there's something outside of my control).

Last night I was an ADHD group for the first time.

CW: suicidal ideation

Firstly, an apology. I've posted here a couple of times during low moments and then never followed up. Received a lot of helpful and sympathetic comments each time and it's kinda shitty I've never even updated my original posts about things being better (because they are).

Onto the meat. Between a couple of long-term relationships and long periods of not really looking for a partner, I hadn't realised I'd managed to get to my late 20s without ever having to 'date'. Both my serious relationships were friends that progressed onto the next level.

Emotionally, this stuff is devastating. Matching with someone who seems interesting and attractive, and they cannot/will not genuinely engage in conversation. Having an amazing conversation with someone in an evening, and then nothing ever again.

Worst are all the feelings associated with RSD when you're not sure there's even a problem. But you are certain there's an issue. How'd you explain that to anyone? How

My boyfriend (44m) was finally diagnosed with ADHD after decades of being in need of medication, and steadily declining mental health. A psychologist diagnosed him, but he can't prescribe the necessary stimulants.

A couple years ago, after he realized he was drinking way too much to cope daily, my bf got a prescription for medical marijuana in TX to help with his PTSD. He has been taking that steadily since then. It's the only thing that helps him feel relaxed, and he would take it every day after work, and on weekends.

The only other doctor he's seen in years (primary care) basically told him that if he prescribed a stimulant, he would require a drug test, and if there was any THC in the drug test, he was "legally required" to stop prescribing any stimulants.

1. That's a lie, and we're damned angry about it. It is entirely up to the doctor's discretion to drug test, and which drugs actually would be a problem. We don't want to go back to a dr that lies to us.
2. He's tried st

You might not like it, or you don't want to hear it at all. But the thing is, for people with ADHD to do simple tasks, they need to mentally break down the process/task and do things 1 by 1.

I'm guessing that most of you know, some of you don't know and the rest of you know but don't implement this.

For ADHDers, Doing simple tasks like taking a shower, making a cup of coffee, cleaning your desk always seem very hard and require a lot of motivation. Or it has been perceived as such. Now, I'm not going further into explaining the brain chemistry behind it. But, what happens basically is, brain gets familiar with feeling overwhelmed to move the body for the things it deems as unnecessary. So it reduces our willpower, drive and desire to do and feel certain things. But it does all of these subconsciously. So we can't detect it in real time.

But we can perceive. As soon as we start to observe ourselves from a 3rd person perspective, as soon as we start to question our actions, our bra

Does anyone use poison pill rings to keep their meds in them?

@adhd

If you do, what are some potential issues I might have with keeping my #adhd #meds in a locket ring? How can I tell if a ring's secret compartment will be big enough? (For context, I use Amoxetine (generic Strattera), which is only available as a caplet)

a nightmarish scenario came to reality for me yesterday!

so - a month ago, my brother got me an interview for a place that I was really looking forward to starting with. as soon as I got the call for the interview, I mentally noted the date - "28th! let's do this! I'll be so prepared!" I spent some time getting some basic notes ready, then went off to easter break to see family before refining my notes and preparation in earnest.

except, it wasn't on the 28th. it was on the 22nd. which I didn't find out until the morning of, 15 minutes before it was happening, thanks to my brother messaging me wishing me luck. I called them to apologise and begged them to schedule me in later - they gave me 30 more minutes. I cried the whole way getting there, then bombed the interview. I got my rejection pretty swiftly, and I'm so devastated.

how the hell does this happen?? this isn't even the first time I've conjured fantastical dates for appointments and events! I even had my confirmation email t

I just wanted to brag about this app with colors and objectives! I can get distracted, and still remember to keep cleaning. When I see a room is in red, that means back to cleaning xD

I'm not in anyway affiliated with the app and just wanted to give them some free add time. The app is called Sweepy and it cost me €17 a year. For the help I'm getting from it, it's worth it.

I hope this helps my ADHD homies out. If anyone has other apps they use through the day, please share!

Not sure how much of a thing this is but I like to have shows playing softly while I sleep, what are your shows you like to help you sleep?

Screen off of course

Cross posted to some other Lemmy AuDHD related subs.

cross-posted from: https://lemm.ee/post/60653809

me_irl

Learn to ride the waves. We have a different rhythm of existence. You can't fight the cycle, but you can learn to work with it.

Some people are marathon runners, but we are sprinters. The trick is to break down marathons into many sprints, and take breaks by switching your marathons.

Just pick half a dozen things your meta-self wants to work on and stick with it. Instead of a bit of everything, we do a lot of everything, but one thing at a time.

Hey all,

not sure if this is an ADHD thing, but it feels like it is. So, I'm a mid/senior level engineer who's been coding professionally for a while now. Before LLMs dropped, I used to get a legit dopamine kick from fixing even the tiniest bugs and getting things to compile. Tedious debugging and diving into docs? Bring it on! It was all part of the fun.

But ever since LLMs came along, that spark has kinda vanished. I feel like my skills are fading by the day. It's like I can't bring myself to code manually or look things up anymore. I know exactly what to ask LLMs and how to fix issues, but the thought of doing it all manually? No thanks.

Now, the only time I get that dopamine hit is when I can implement entire features that should take days in just a few prompts. Anything less feels like a waste of time. I hate feeling so dependent on it, especially since I know the code it spits out isn't always top-notch. I know how to fix it, but I just can't bring myself to do it. Especially

A good friend of mine is falling down the Xitter to Red Hat pipeline and it has me thinking about how to get better at remembering sources of information or, hell, just remember certain topics long enough to research them thoroughly enough to be able to speak at least somewhat eloquently about the topic.

Fairly confident the friend is going to follow the path he's going to follow, so I'm not looking for advice on that.

I'm 35, with diagnosed ADHD and brain scarring. My memory feels so fried and it's almost Impossible to finish a task. Where I live it's almost Impossible to get actual medication for something. Doc always gives herbal treatments and it helps nothing.

Is there a way to help myself without meds?

cross-posted from: https://beehaw.org/post/19161653

Rule

Literally have no idea what I think about them other than that it seems like a hopeless exercise. Its kinda worrying, like the meds can make you hyperfocus on things and make you paranoid but who knows, they could be right?

Altho it is a great bandwagon for the name brand dominating med companies to jump on, very easy to turn people away from generic meds that must have some baseline of quality assurance and clinical efficacy?

Uggh, just don't know. Wish everyone could take the brand name cheaply like its easily possible to in many places outside the US. Dex cost me like 1.50 a pill before insurance and like less than 30 after total. Its almost 1500 in the states. Insane

cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/27480773

Found a rule while deleting my reddit comments

quote the image:

"I've gathered my materials

"and planned every last detail.

"I have set time aside. So now all I need is...

"to start an entirely different project!"