Like... before y'all yell "narcissist"... I do genuinely think there is a part of her that "cares" about me... but I feel like its a kinda twisted and weird way of "love"...

I'm not going to diagnose her, because all I know about her is from your post and the one comment. What I will say, though, is just because someone seems to care about someone, doesn't mean that they're not a narcissist. Narcissists will often make it so their actions seem caring, and that is specifically part of what they use to hook you.

Take my example - I was abused by a narcissist for a year or so. One of the things she did was to worry about my alcohol consumption. Seems like a genuine caring thing to do, alcoholism can be a serious problem. I like to party, but I'm not an alcoholic and never have been. But here's the thing: partying is usually when I saw my friends, and those friends were worried about what was happening to me. They didn't know the ins and outs of emotional abuse, but they knew that something was off, and they knew my abuser was up to no good. Of course, my abuser didn't want me to realize what was going on, so that was a way of getting me to have less contact with those friends (she also "worried" that they were the wrong crowd to hang out with). And I generally believed that she was genuinely concerned, albeit misguided - due to all the manipulation, there was no way in hell that I would believe it wasn't genuine concern. And I believed it for a hell of a long time. It was kind of a catch 22 - how could I possibly accuse her of having ulterior motives if she's doing so much for me, even if it is misguided? And because I wouldn't dare accuse her of having ulterior motives, I contributed to believe that she was actually doing things for me, making me more emotionally attached. It took me three months after I was out of that situation to realize that maybe she wasn't doing all these things out of the misguided goodness of her heart, and that maybe there was some other reason. And then, things started to click. In a horrifying fashion.

Let's come back to your situation. You had mentioned that it is a matter of control, which is spot on. Let's take that a bit further: as you alluded to, it means you can't talk honestly about the relationship with your mother. That seems to be something you want to do, and rightly so. What could the consequences be if you take to your therapist about that relationship? Well you could come to the realization that the relationship is toxic, or abusive. That realization is the first step to getting out of a toxic or abusive relationship, and that is in all likelihood something your mother wants to avoid at all costs. So, essentially, being there when that topic comes up could be a way to nip it at the bud.

I'm not saying that she is a narcissist. What I am saying is that it's in your best interest to not discount that possibility all that quickly, especially since your reason for discounting it is typical for people who are experiencing narcissistic abuse but haven't come to terms with it yet. Take your time, and try to stay open minded, even if it is very difficult in that kind of a situation (and definitely try to find a way to speak with your therapist without your mother around, you are absolutely on the right track with that).