Problem with VPFs is irrigation throttling, or lack thereof. Most people are cool, but I've heard of people hosting exotics which just max out downstream 24/7. Plus everyone has root access which gets abused frequently.
Front end dev fully turned towards the back end dev, drinking a juice box, happy to let them take all the attention so no one asks him difficult questions like why a deprecated component (the green bike's chain) is hanging around creating a potential safety hazard while doing nothing useful. Back end dev awkwardly skirting the matter of a snowballing reliance on SQL stored proc spaghetti until finally one matter arises on which they can both speak confidently and in unison. How does this clusterfuck stack fit together? "REST API".
I'm sorry you're going through this, Smorty. It won't be forever. Please keep sharing. š
Myeeah, narcissist or not, she fumbled a lot of opportunities to show empathy here. It sounds like she wanted you to know what an ordeal this was for her which I think is pretty shitty. I admire your tenacity in sticking out the conversation.
Also I don't know if she does have a point about having to repeat yourself. I personally felt much more comfortable coming out to every friend and family member oneābyāone, and must have repeated myself at least 20 times now. I felt more confident and empowered each time. It also served as good practice in owning my identity when it came time to change my name legally, and everything that came along with that.
The bottom line is that it's totally up to you how you want to come out, fast or slow, privately or publicly. You shouldn't have to be made more uncomfortable than the whole thing already is.
You wear it like it's pink š
Edit: I realise this is far from the outfit above, but having gone to the effort of digging up the childhood book of which I was reminded, I had to post it.
Smorty no... š„
Them: I like your shoes.
Me: Thank you!
Brain: That was really selfish of you to not notice and compliment them on something first. Pretty entitled of you to just accept their compliment like you know you deserve it. Do you even think of anyone other than yourself? You are such a selfāabsorbed attention whore and they know that now.
The affirming experience of being harassed as a woman!
Okay, if you're progressing towards the goals you feel are most important right now then I'm happy for you. The impression I got was that you still don't feel comfortable enough articulating the true severity of your issues to make any real progress, but perhaps I'm missing the whole story. I'm sorry if I overstepped.
Monthly blood checkups is insane! My prescriber only wants quarterly, but I guess the frequency isn't the point for you. >1 is too many. Needle fear is real. I really hope you can make some progress with that soon. Perhaps your doctor could prescribe an anxiolytic to help you ease into it. Never hurts to ask!
What do you think separates your Lemmy persona from IRL? Do you feel more comfortable expressing yourself authentically here than out in the world? I find it hard to believe that the "real you" is a totally different person. I know you struggle to express your femininity out there, and probably conceal a lot of yourself. Plenty of us have been there, and we realise in retrospect that we weren't doing nearly as good a job of masking as we thought we were. That's kinda the whole theme of egg_irl.
If you've exhausted your allotment of therapy sessions for this period, and you're still not feeling comfortable enough to speak plainly with your therapist, then I agree with TotallynotJessica that this speaks to a failing on their part, or at least indicates that this therapist isn't a good fit for you. I'm on my sixth psychologist, and it took me until now to feel comfortable digging deep and really working through stuff in a meaningful way.
It sucks that you have to shop around like this, and go to all the time, expense and emotional burden of opening up to new psychs trying to find the right one, but it will serve you well in the end. It sounds like you've made enough of an effort with this one to declare that they're not right for you, and it might be time to cut your losses.
ITT: "go to the vet". Please give us closure now. Have you been to the vet?
Flashback to 9āyearāold me sitting by the radio with a blank cassette in the drawer waiting for this song to come on so I could record it. If it's an egg song, then this totally tracks with everything else about my childhood.
I think you're lying. I think you were able to read it just fine on your own.
More Smorty content! MĢ·ĶĶĶĢĢĢĶĢ„ĢOĢ“ĶĢØĶĶĢ¢ĶRĢ·ĢĢæĢĶĢĢĶEĢ“ĢĢĶ Ģ ĢĢĢĢĢĢĢĢĢÆ!
I am once again imploring you to keep doing what you're doing, and bend to no perceived pressure to be anyone else's idea of funny or interesting. There is only one person in the whole lemmyverse making Smorty content right now. And she's inspiring me to think about possibly intending to maybe one day learn Krita.
Biology -> biolog -> biologist
China -> chin -> chinist?
Okay but imagine getting anally impaled and then just dying. That still seems like not a bad deal.
How To With John Wilson but in LA and with less autism.
I like talking to people now
HRT day 17.
I always wanted to be more social. I cared about people, wanted to know them more deeply, and wanted them to know me. I just never enjoyed the experience because I felt that the time people spent on me was an arduous act of charity that they endured for my sake, out of politeness and perhaps pity. I therefore kept to myself, unintentionally presented a pretty hard exterior that made me seem abrasive and antisocial, and spent nights wishing I could be closer to people around me. I was ashamed of who I was, and ultimately faded out of the lives of everyone I met sooner or later, once I felt I'd revealed too much of myself to put them through any more. It was lonely, and worst of all, many of these people continued trying to reach out while I sequestered myself and waited for the guilt to subside.
Short of growing breasts and marked shifts in fat distribution that I likely won't see for many months, I can never be sure what's an estrogen thing, what's a placebo thing, and wh