This is a throwaway because I legitimately feel like a huge pos for making this post. So let me start off with saying:

I know I am 100% in the wrong here and I want to change it. I am grateful for every help I can get. Feel free to rip into me but I really want to change the way I think but I don't know how.

I have had troubles with finding a partner for forever. Only thing I ever did with someone was making out with a girl at a party but nothing beyond that. I also never had a relationship and I am in my mid 20's. Up until a week that is. I got into a friends with benefits situation with one of my closest friends. She knew I was completely inexperienced and took my viriginity.

Ever since that happend it has been great. I am at her place as much as possible and we both really, really, really like each others company. I sincerely mean it when I say I enjoy every minute with her as long as it is with her.

And she feels very similar. I think she might like me even more than I do her