I hate myself right now, am I a bad person? I feel like one.

So I’m only 15. While I hope my boyfriend is the one for me, I also doubt it. I have had a girlfriend “Amy” since I was 12 but I am polyamorous and so is my boyfriend “Avery”. He is also dating some dude who I’ll call “Alex” since his name starts with the same letter as Avery’s and my girlfriend’s.

He said he’d love to call sometime and I’m sure he loves us equally, but he calls Alex for hours a day, for like 5-12 hours, and barely acknowledges my texts, he just reads them. In fact, he asked me to hang out with him but that was because he was bored that Alex wouldn’t be coming over.

Idk what to do. I feel wrongfully a bit sad and like I’m the bad guy.

They sleep on calls all the time too at night and I’m trying not to care but I’m sad because he spends more time with Alex than me. I wanna sleep over at his house sometime and do all the stuff they do but he can’t because he’s always busy with Alex. Maybe I’d be liked more if I was a boy…