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Shirow

@ Shirow @lemmy.zip

Posts
3
Comments
40
Joined
4 mo. ago

  • Guess I have boobs now

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  • Glad for you! Hope I can feel the same way about not fearing being able to boymode anymore. For now it scares me a bit about being out to everyone.

    It's been 2 months for me and people will probably think of it as fat for now (even though they are definitely growing fast). Wearing a sports bra to bind them a bit and a large sweatshirt at work. But I feel like it's gonna be really hard to hide after 3 months.

    I'm heavy at the same time this month I merely lost half a kilo (I've been a bit obscessed about my weight, well always have been. I'd like to be less bulky. I always felt like a small thing in a body that is too big for me. (And the clothes choice is better with smaller clothes 🥲).

    But I've seen some changes from exercise and that's a good thing. Just need to be able to eat healthier (which is hard task since I'm a sugar junky and compensate for probably a lack of dopamine this way.)

  • buns rule

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  • French intensifies

  • Eeeeek

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  • They do 👉👈

  • no joke rule

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  • I try to find the courage to do some small task everyday and then do more in the week-end.

    Hard to have energy left. I push through to do a little bit of sports almost everyday too. I cannot fathom what parents go through everyday.

  • The Button

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  • I may add even without an option to turn back I would.

  • I fucking hate Depression/Dysphoria

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  • Awesome game FNV. I should replay it. (Even though it's harder for me to find the will to play video games now. Been better lately)

    Then I don't really know what to say about depression. I've lived some hard times with it struggling with body issues and addiction (well mine is about sugar... I can't say it's the same as you but it never helped about my weight and liver). And my mom had some mental health issues that probably affected me too.

    It's hard to find a reason to keep fighting. I struggled 3 years in university failing and at some point I started just going to the gym instead hiding from my parents that I didn't go to university. Mine was trying hard to fix myself and trying a fresh start ( I don't know how I started). But the turning point was when I met my wife I've met 8 years ago. I didn't even fathom my transidentity (I've been really dense and was probably running away from it.). At first I didn't know her troubles and then I had to stay strong to support her and pushing away my troubles to help her. (No that wasn't healthy for me...)

    I can't really tell you how I've been handling this, there's ups and downs throughout our relationship, but so far I'm not taking any meds even though it would probably have been easier. Maybe I was running away from psychiatrist because I've never found one that I would consider safe?

    Anyway, I think love made me push this far. I don't know if I will be happy with the changes of my body with HRT, but I keep hoping. At least even though if I'm not entirely happy with myself I know it will still be better than before. And mostly people will find beauty where you would not about yourself. It's hard to love myself but when I see my wife loving me and the way I look even though sometimes I loathe the way I look, well I glad someone can appreciate me this way.

    I don't know if this message makes sense or will help but that's a sum up of my experience.

  • egg😰irl

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  • I feel targeted 🫣 I have some ideas but I feel I'm missing something. Like there was a name I can't remember from something I watched or read that influenced and would be right.

  • Timeline :3

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  • Wish I knew sooner to but better late than never ☺️

    Awesome change though, in almost 2 months in.

  • [CW: Mentions Cancer] Anyone have any tips on dealing with dysphoria stemming from Baldness

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  • I don't have any advice about it since I've never lived anything like it. Here's a virtual hug 🫂

  • Ready for my morning run 🏃🏽‍♀️‍➡️

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  • I'm a bit jealous. You look great ☺️

  • Companies should be glad, that other people are helping them with their offsite backup

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  • And file sharing. Sometimes a paywall 😥

  • HRT is great. (for me. and it's a bit scary. for me.)

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  • You've just put word on something I've been dealing with since my teenage years : anhedonia. Something I've been dealing without medication for 15 years or so.

    I feel more at ease with myself since I started HRT. Still I don't know if I should consult for that. I know I've been better lately since my egg cracked and started HRT like I've been laughing more easilly, feeling more to be put bluntly.

  • egg🤦‍♀️irl

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  • Guess who thought he should give up thinking to be a woman and accept himself 2 years ago. (Totally not an egg btw)

    This girl who was in denial and today on hrt. 👈

  • It kind of is like that

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  • It feels like you are describing me. 😅

  • How do you come out to people?

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  • I made some kind of announcement to my close relative that are safe after either inviting them over or going over to them. "At some point I went by oh by the way I have something to tell you. I'm transitioning and started HRT F. Feel free to still use my name as I haven't yet chosen my name I will go by.

    As for work (oh boy lots of racist people and probably transphobes... 🤞) and my parents (might go correctly or poorly 🤷‍♀️, but since my dad depends on me for things he cannot do anymore. He has more to loose by rejecting me and so far I know he loves his kids...) They gonna have to ask questions themselves when they will notice that I look more and more feminine.

  • foold u

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  • Sometimes for Ice cream too.

  • How's your week been?

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  • Basically planning the administrative hellhole to be able to get my hormones and others things covered (mostly covered) for my transition. Since I've have not a great reaction to benzyl Benzoate from the DIY EEn. For now I have to accommodate to the inflammation it gives me at the injection site and probably guide the doctor apprently friendly but she doesn't know much about transition.

    I think I will give out my second vial to the local trans association for someone in need. Still hard for me to train my voice though. I don't find time except in the car going to work. Can't help to feel like I sound silly when I try to speak with my "feminine" voice.

  • foold u

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  • Haha... I'm lactose intolerant anyway 🫢

  • I can assure this is totally not me

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  • 👉👈

  • Transfem @lemmy.blahaj.zone
    Shirow @lemmy.zip

    Dysphoria crisis.