I hate my "true" voice (as in voice recordings). Do you like your own voice?

So like... I tried to read one paragraph of the manuscript of my memoir... like just a paragraph of my "origin story"... and... I sort of expected it to sound dramatic like a movie character revealing their backstory...

But jesus christ I sounds like I'm still a kid lmfao... I mean as in the way I articulate the words... I sound like a kid/teen... and like not in a cute way, as in the "annoying kid" type of way...

I fucking hate my voice...

Do y'all like your voice?

I tried to record myself sing and ahhh its sounds awful... I cringe at my own voice...

I actually like my voice as the bones vibrate throught my skull, I hate the recording, the "real" voice.

Also I realized I sound so weird when I talk in English... my voice in Cantonese sounds a bit more "normal"... Mandarin is... has a "southern China" accent

But the thing is tho... I comprehend more when I listen to English content, I've been in the US since I was 8...

But when speaking it, I sound very weird...

Oh yea now I'm out of school and haven't really have friends to talk to in English and just hear Cantonese at home a lot... so I might've accidentally "acquired an accent"?

I didn't really record my voice before when I was still in K-12 when I used English more often so idk what my "real voice" sounded like back then, but now it sounds really weird...

Do you get an accent if you don't use a language often then try to talk in it again? Is that even a thing?

Idk if its an "accent" or if my voice is just ugly lmao.